Dear Diary: The One-Year Anniversary

When you have experienced an abortion, there are certain times of the year that seem to be more difficult than other times. Usually, the anniversary of the abortion date or the baby’s due date can trigger intense fear and sadness in the lives of women who have undergone abortions. At times, it can affect every aspect of one’s life. In today’s journal entry, the writer explains the struggle her friend is having as she approaches the one-year anniversary of her abortion.   

anniversaryDear Diary,  

Yesterday, I was with my friend, Brittany. I finally got myself to leave the house and do something social. Brittany and I were at the mall. I noticed that she was acting different. Brittany is a very outgoing and sociable person. However, she was very reserved yesterday. I asked her what was wrong and if she wanted to talk about it. She turned and looked at me and immediately burst into tears. “I had an abortion exactly one year ago today. Today is the one year anniversary.” 


I was shocked. I had no idea that she had an abortion and she did not know about mine either. Right away, I stopped walking and hugged her as tight as I could. I whispered to her that I can relate to how she was feeling because I had also had an abortion just a couple of months ago. She seemed confused and relieved at the same time. We talked about the details of our abortions and we were there for each other. As bad as I feel for Brittany and what she is going through during this time, I am also a little hopeful because now that I know that one of my closest friends knows exactly what I have been going through, we can now rely on each other for moral support. 


I feel so bad for Brittany that her “anniversary date” falls during Respect Life Month. It is hard enough at any time of the year but I think October would be the most difficult month to be feeling all of these emotions. I feel like there are just so many more constant reminders of the choice that we made and are hurting so much because of. For example,  as I drive around, I see several churches that have all of the white crosses out. Each cross is meant to represent a certain amount of babies who were aborted. Sometimes I feel angry towards the cross displays because I think about the situations that the mothers were in in order to have made that choice. Obviously, no woman ever wants to be in that place that they have to make the hardest decision of their life. Sometimes the displays make me feel like nobody seems to care about the women who made that choice. Many women are completely heartbroken (like I am) after their abortions. The little white crosses just add to the heartbreak. 


At least Brittany and I know that we can be there for each other and that we both have an understanding, nonjudgmental, and compassionate shoulder to cry on.  This is the most hopeful that I have felt in a long time. 

Restore helps those for whom the lingering effects of abortion continue to cause pain.  We serve teens and adults in both group and individual formats. Don’t let another anniversary pass before getting help. Please call or text Restore at 630-599-0043 to find out more about our confidential, compassionate, and nonjudgmental post abortion support services.